Have you finally orgasmed yet?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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