I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
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