you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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