everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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