It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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