What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
