Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
