Ambien. No doubt about it.
this boner is exhausting
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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