would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I need to align my fucking chakras
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
