____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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