okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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