My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize