Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
