do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
