Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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