You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize