just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
