Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
