So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
farters have to be the big spoon...
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
the day after is always just damage control
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize