I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
