It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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