It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I FOUND THE LEGS
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