On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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