You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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