yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
God, you're like boner-b-gone
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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