Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize