So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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