oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.