Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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