My brain says no but my pants say off.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Randomize