Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
