I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
