Your mouth is God's brothel.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
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