you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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