just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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