Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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