she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
