So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
you inspire me to be a worse person
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
