I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
