I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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