Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
