508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
