ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
