saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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