Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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