forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize