There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Why are your pants in the freezer?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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