You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
