Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.

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(815): View more from Illinois

i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"

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(310): View more from California

so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?

(818): View more from California

by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ

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(778): View more from British Columbia

The beer is more important than you right now.

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(817): View more from Texas

We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested

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(703): View more from Virginia

I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.

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(516): View more from New York

He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.

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(281): View more from Texas

Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?

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