a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
